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Muslim Blogs > Fatima22's blogs > Hijab....Support From Guys Too.??
Hijab....Support From Guys Too.?? Sort by:
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fatima22
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Posted on Thu, Sep 28, 2006 07:54

Aslmkm I met an ex colleague and she gasped when she saw me in hijab. She asked **What happened?? Why?? If you have it, flaunt it (refering to the female physique), afterall God gave us these assets! How to get a guy interested in us if we are all covered up??** Unfazed, I explained our difference in opinion........ When we are at a book store and we intend to buy a book, the natural thing to do is to browse through the books, then when we decide to buy a copy for ourselves, which copy do we take? Most likely we do not want to choose the one that has been exposed and touched by many, but we would take the one that is still wrapped and in good condition. This, I feel, is likened to the female in hijab. When a guy intends to search for a bride, he looks around, and I would think that any Allah-fearing muslim would be inclined to choose the female who is modestly covered in hijab where her physical beauty has not been exposed and her social and physical interaction with other guys had not been so liberal. Another beauty of the hijab is that when a man chooses you for his wife, at least you can have some assurance that he must have been attracted to you for your inner beauty because your physical beauty was previously hidden from him. He must have been attracted to your mind, your mannerism and character, because only these can be observed while you are in hijab. Then when the union is formed, he can still be awed by your physical beauty which has been guarded solely for the special one. Physical beauty fades with age, but inner beauty is more tangible. A union based on the attraction of the inner beauty would help to stand the test of time in marriage. Hope this would encourage more muslimahs to see the added wisdom behind Allah's swt command for the hijab and not be discouraged by those who put you down for your decision in wearing the hijab. My analysis above is based on a female's point of view.....Wonder if the guys are of the same view ??? From some other blogs, sisters have voiced their dilemma that though in faith the brothers claim they support the hijab but in practice they tend to pick the non-hijab.......is this the human tendency???


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fatima22
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Posted on Mon, Feb 11, 2008 06:59

Hurray for Turkey! I was told by a friend that the new government is doing much to lift the ban of the veil in the country. This is great news and this is the kind of support from the top that is so encouraging. I salute the wife of the Turkish leader for daring to keep her veil which one does not see the wives of the muslim leaders in other countries setting such example.


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fatima22
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Posted on Mon, Jun 25, 2007 10:40

Aslmkm Donning the Hijab--Liberty! is so beatifully written with genuine passion and valid views. I believe most muslimahs know about the truth and values of the hijab but they find it hard to "survive" in this secular world so they just conform to the demands. Some have even quoted that islam allows flexibility when in desperate needs, like it is allowed to even consume pork if they can find no other food... and surviving in present western world to be accepted in schools or to get a job are desperate needs to them... Others have mentioned that they plan to wear the hijab only after they've got a husband as they see the hijab as a hindrance to the possibility of being chosen by guys to be their wife... Yet others say that we cannot "force upon" them to wear tha hijab as they should be allowed do it willingly and at their own time.....as even Allah swt has given them the power to choose.. It is amazing how people can produce so much reasoning to validate their actions!


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fatima22
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Posted on Mon, Jun 25, 2007 10:21

ASKLM Yes the thought of divorce did cross her mind but they have only recently got married and it is less than 6 months.. divorce would be very hard on her... She has asked her family members to help talk to her husband but they are afraid to intervene saying that she now belongs to her husband and asked her not to regard it as haram as she has her permission from her husband and she is only doing what pleases him!


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american4islam
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Posted on Wed, Jun 20, 2007 00:22

The following is from one of my personal blogs. It's kind of long, but I had a lot of things on my mind at the time and wanted to get it all out. Here goes: Donning the Hijab--Liberty! Oh, the age-old hijab debate! "Why do Muslim women have to cover their heads?" This question is one asked by Muslim and non-Muslim alike. The hijab has been a source of much dissent between us and Western society, as well as a source of controversy for centuries and will probably continue for many more. This is mainly due to the West's perception of us as opposed to the way we see ourselves. To every Muslimah who wears the hijab, Westerners ask, "Don't you get tired of all those clothing? Why do you allow yourself to be oppressed?" In their eyes, the hijab reflects Islam's oppression of women. (The US war against Afghanistan's Taliban regime put Islam front and center in the American consciousness. Some of the most popular news reports were about Afghan women reclaiming their jobs, their studies, and their right to remove the head-to-toe burqa covering.) The West says, "Islam degrades you; democracy will liberate you! Take off that veil! Let us give you the right to be equal to men, equal in education, equal in rights!" We know that there may be good intentions, however misguided, to 'help' us. We say, however, "Thanks, but no thanks." Muslim women in the West aren't subject to brutal religious police and laws deemed oppressive. We have access to so-called 'liberty' and appreciate it. However, we bristle at assumptions about the nature of Islam and a woman's place in it. For many women wearing hijab is one of the truest tests of being a Muslim. The answer to the questions is very simple - Muslim women observe HIJAB (covering the head and the body) because Allah (SWT) has told us to do so. "And tell the believing women to subdue their eyes, and maintain their chastity. They shall not reveal any parts of their bodies, except that which is necessary. They shall cover their chests, and shall not relax this code in the presence of other than their husbands, their fathers, the fathers of their husbands, their sons, the sons of their husbands, their brothers, the sons of their brothers, the sons of their sisters, other women, the male servants or employees whose sexual drive has been nullified, or the children who have not reached puberty. They shall not strike their feet when they walk in order to shake and reveal certain details of their bodies. All of you shall repent to Allah, O you believers, that you may succeed. (Qur'an 24:31) Like our Afghan sisters, Western Muslim women would like to stress that culture shapes our lives as much as religion. If we have problems, the hijab certainly isn't one of them. We welcome change for our Muslim sisters overseas, but on terms that suit their societies. Most of all, we would like Westerners to stop rehashing old clich?s about who we are. How does culture shape our lives, you ask? Look at what we are surrounded by! Sadly, it seems that the cornerstone of Western culture is immorality and extravagance. People 'shacking up'--couples living like man and wife but never marrying-- is practically the norm. I feel that perhaps the most visible and marked expression of this culture is in the clothing. Shorter, tighter and more revealing is the rule. Western clothing, instead of covering and distracting any wrongful glances, is of course designed for flirting, attracting and arousing. Who can blame these clothing designers and advertisers for launching these trends? After all, people constantly buy into the message rammed into our heads just about daily that SEX SELLS! (We all know that these corporations are more than willing to sell their souls for a quick buck.) I live in D.C., America's capital, and I take the Metro train to work every day. Talking to my male friends, I deduced that summer must be their favorite season ever! They tell me to just look outside. Yes, I can see it, every single hot, muggy day. I am bombarded with a barrage of cleavage, legs, nipples, thighs, almost everything that Allah (SWT) has physically blessed womankind with! The men are no better; tight, crotch-revealing pants, cut-off wife beaters, saggy pants exposing hundreds of thousands of plumbers' cracks, the whole nine! Turn on the TV, it's Girls Gone Wild commercials and raunchy videos on MTV and BET. Turn on the radio, it's about 100 or so different ways to 'sex you up'. Go outside, and it's teenagers all over each other in public, and if you're really lucky, guy on guy or girl on girl action! Yay! SEX! You get the point. Islam teaches that to make women into sex objects for men's pleasure surely isn't liberation. In fact, it's a dehumanizing form of oppression that we firmly reject. If we are going to live in this society, we definitely can't (and shouldn't) be expected to embrace what most Westerners deem as 'liberation'. If I, as a Muslimah, am to live in a society that permits women and men to mingle freely, display themselves, and compete or allure one another through sexual attraction, I know that the stakes and consequences are significant. I can either ignore the decree of my Creator, Allah (SWT), and descend into the debauchery that is typical of this culture, or I can be steadfast in my faith and free myself of the pitfalls of a selfish, lewd way of life. As for simplicity in Western culture, it's almost a kind of tragedy. (Cue violins.) Since most people can't afford to indulge in anything extravagant, hence merely due to circumstances, they are forced to adopt a simple lifestyle in order to keep up appearances. How many times do you hear of people who can barely afford their homes but splurge on designer clothing and expensive cars? Consumer slavery seems to be a part of Western life. If you don't have the latest Jordans or an Escalade, it's tragic. As for clothing, if the real thing's not available, a fake will also do. If it's not a name-brand product, it's surely only for the have-nots, even if it is of a better quality and lesser cost! When we don the hijab, we choose to liberate ourselves from a psychological sexual slavery and excessive consumerism that plagues our society. We command respect, and through our modesty, we protect ourselves from superficial judgments. The message we give is this: 'Respect me for who I am. I am not a sex object.' Muslim women, contrary to popular belief, are not veiling our femininity, rather, we are shrouding our sexuality, thus allowing sincere, pure feminine beauty and worth to shine. I know that we are cherished and respected by our men and others, we are recognized by the content of our character rather than by our physical attributes, and we are identified as chaste, God-fearing women. From the Islamic point of view, liberated Western women who must often worry about their looks, figure, and youth for the pleasure of others are trapped in a form of slavery.


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american4islam
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Posted on Tue, Jun 19, 2007 14:24

Assalaam alaikum everyone. A Muslim wife should obey her husband in all what he commands as long as it is not haram. Since the hijab is required, any man who commands his wife to remove it is disobeying a command of Allah (SWT). No wife should obey any such command. If the husband insists on forcing his wife to do something haram, then it's time for divorce.


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SARAHA2001
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Posted on Sun, Jun 17, 2007 11:20

Re: MaxJamal write: salams everyone as a person who wears something happened to me on more than one occosion i am still a student in a school were i am the only person that wears the hajab everyone look at me like i am goin to kill them or something like if i am goin to bomb the school or what. one of my teacher is a hindi and she does not like muslims at all so she act with me like i am stupid and that's how she is. all though at time i want to tell her something i jus hold my tongue.i just say to myself may allah guide her. at some time ago abt last yr in november i left home for school and on my way home from school i remember i did not pick up the key for the house and that no one will be home for hrs to come. so i had no other choice but to clam over a 12ft gate. at that time i was on top of the gate with on foot inside and the other outside and you know what happened. the police passed and saw me and at that moment i was wearing a black hajab and i blew across my face that only my eyes were showing and the police stop and told me to come down from there i was already in a bad mood for school so i came down on the other side to my house. the two police officer draw there guns for me . were i went of the key and open the gate. i was already angry cause there knew that i was the only muslim of that village that wears the hajab. so i answer in a very harsh vioce to them " ya what is it you want" and at that same moment my dog came out barking at them. they answer me in a very soft voice and withdrew the guns. as there were lookin at me in a my frightin way i ask them if i was not wearin the hajab would you have stop in the first place. and not waitin for a answer i just walk off. this had happen many time that i stop countin. and the muost remarkable thing abt it is that very one is afriad of muslims in my country. thank you for hearin what had happen to me. sorry abt the misspelt words lol salams



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fatima22
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Posted on Sun, Jun 17, 2007 10:59

Assalamualaikum Somehow my first entry that started this blog was erased and i do not know how this happened...??? Anyway, a friend of mine recently got married and her husband has insisted that she do away with the hijab when she attends offcial fucntions with him. He holds a high position in his company and he said that the hijab embarasses him when he brings her along to functions where his bosses and clients are present. Many a time she is reluctant to go with him because she feels awkward without her hijab, but her husband insists she comes along for the good of his image in the company. So this is one of the situation where guys may not necessarily support the hijab, and how difficult it is for the wife, when she is instructed to be obedient to her husabnd as well...


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ajjubaba
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Posted on Fri, Mar 02, 2007 10:31

salam fatima its your real jewelry hijab were it. iam proud of sisters who follow hijab.


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baqi9
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Posted on Fri, Mar 02, 2007 09:03

As salaamu alaikum believers, Fatima it Islamic to help another Muslim in matters they may be ignorant of or fall short in or just plain reject. The reminder benefits the believer. If they reject you that is fine. But if they reject what Allah and His messenger SAWS say, then that is a problem for them. Just repeat the evidences anytime you get the chance, and show the people as you already are, that this is showing your love of Allah wa Rasul Allah. Maymoonstar, what did the police say if they even came? And was there other people around who told the kafr just how stupid she was acting? I use to hear of these stories on a regular, but have never seen this happen, masha Allah. I guess it really does matter where you live on just how frequent these issues occur. Also I must say that there are sisters who wrap their hair in a scarf from Muslim backgrounds as well as non-Muslim backgrounds who think this is okay, or modestly dressed...wrong. They wear pants lose or tight thinking that this too is proper. The same thing with their shirt. Men are supposed to wear clothing of a man, and women are supposed to wear the clothing of a woman. There are reasons that a sister may have to wear pants and shirt, like in having to support herself or family. The same thing for the hijaab. She may have to shorten it tighten it or even remove it because of her job. In the fataaws that I've read or heard about on this issue, the sister is still sinning, its just that she is doing the lesser of the 2 evils. The advice is that she doesn't stay in that job longer than she can find work that allows her to dress properly. Also it is true that men are supposed to lower our gaze just as sisters are. But sister your leaving something out in brothers looking at improperly dressed sisters or kufr. That is, men are attracted to the things you described. That is no excuse, just reality. Allah gives you the first look. Notice I said look not stare. But what is the intention of that look? It does however show weakness in our iman in the manner your refering to. Allah knew we'd do it, but He also have us solutions for it, walhamdulilah.


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baqi9
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Posted on Fri, Mar 02, 2007 09:01

As salaamu alaikum believers, Fatima it Islamic to help another Muslim in matters they may be ignorant of or fall short in or just plain reject. The reminder benefits the believer. If they reject you that is fine. But if they reject what Allah and His messenger SAWS say, then that is a problem for them. Just repeat the evidences anytime you get the chance, and show the people as you already are, that this is showing your love of Allah wa Rasul Allah. Maymoonstar, what did the police say if they even came? And was there other people around who told the kafr just how stupid she was acting? I use to hear of these stories on a regular, but have never seen this happen, masha Allah. I guess it really does matter where you live on just how frequent these issues occur. Also I must say that there are sisters who wrap their hair in a scarf from Muslim backgrounds as well as non-Muslim backgrounds who think this is okay, or modestly dressed...wrong. They wear pants lose or tight thinking that this too is proper. The same thing with their shirt. Men are supposed to wear clothing of a man, and women are supposed to wear the clothing of a woman. There are reasons that a sister may have to wear pants and shirt, like in having to support herself or family. The same thing for the hijaab. She may have to shorten it tighten it or even remove it because of her job. In the fataaws that I've read or heard about on this issue, the sister is still sinning, its just that she is doing the lesser of the 2 evils. The advice is that she doesn't stay in that job longer than she can find work that allows her to dress properly. Also it is true that men are supposed to lower our gaze just as sisters are. But sister your leaving something out in brothers looking at improperly dressed sisters or kufr. That is, men are attracted to the things you described. That is no excuse, just reality. Allah gives you the first look. Notice I said look not stare. But what is the intention of that look? It does however show weakness in our iman in the manner your refering to. Allah knew we'd do it, but He also have us solutions for it, walhamdulilah.


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snowfall7
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Posted on Sun, Feb 25, 2007 05:18

Its true and i have realised that some person really want others attention. Its true for men or women both.People not coming from muslim background think there is nothing wrong and women know and uses the art of attracting mens attraction. they are just expert enough to expose artistically the sensual curve or her body by dressing herself in exposing dresses.The fact that sexual crimes is on high rise in such places is evidence that its not good thing.


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munirkhan
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Posted on Wed, Feb 21, 2007 12:50

aslamo alaikum sister. i think all female world are beautiful in the islamic dress.


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fatima22
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Posted on Tue, Feb 20, 2007 10:44

assalamualaikum sister maymoonstar Gosh, that screaming lady was unreasonably paranoid!! I agree with what u said about the lack of support of the hijab by Muslims. It is bad enough that Non Muslims are prejudiced against us....... but when Muslims do the same, it can crumble our conviction if we are weak. That is why i believe it is very important that muslimahs know the real reason why they are wearing the hijab in the first place, and that they are doing so because they personally desire to. In this way, they will not be discouraged when faced with oppositions. Since i decided to put on the hijab, i have been put to test many times and have met with many adverse reactions, especially in my job opportunities. Once, i had contributed a couple of comments and views to a magazine and its management team must have been impressed, because they contacted me to offer the chance of being their regular feature writer. When i went down to be interviewd, as requested, they were taken aback when they saw me in hijab! There were 2 persons interviewing me and the one who was making a big issue of my hijab-wearing was the muslim guy !! His non muslim colleague was surprised, but she was more interested in my writing abilities. I told them that, with all due respect, i did not see why my hijab could be an obstacle in the job because it was my articles they wanted, not my physical presentation! They gave some excuses that it would be difficult to gain access to certain interviews, invitations, etc, but I insisted those were just lame excuses. They eventually were willing to give me the job, but the muslim guy asked if i could comply to give them a photo of myself, WITHOUT MY HIJAB, to accompany my published articles. I replied that HE, of all persons, should be more understanding of the islamic teachings, and for him to make such a request was really shocking and disappointing. So i told them, thanks.... but no thanks...the job did not interest me anymore. From Female Muslims, there are times i get the reaction that i "sabotage" their religious stand. One even told me in the face that my hijab wearing embarasses them because people around often ask how is it a revert is covering herself, while they as born muslims, are baring themselves? To remarks like these, i simply reply that i am in no position to tell them what they should or should not wear, so I expect they do likewise to my choice of dressing....end of discussion!


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inmelayu
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Posted on Sat, Jan 20, 2007 11:08

As-salam-allayakum, I really don't understand the people who question hijab. These r the people who will claim to do things on their personal choice and if a pious muslimaha wants to have her personal choice of following Islam and wear hijab then why create a fuss. Anyway it is matter of personal choice for both of them, if you see in non-believer's perspective.


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Posted on Sun, Oct 29, 2006 12:59

I must say that I think women look more beautiful in Islamic dress.


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AbdulSamed2008
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Posted on Tue, Oct 24, 2006 13:46

it is easy to generalise I prefer a hijabi woman not only hijabi but also a woman who knows how to dress according to islam.not showing body parts nor her figure.you reffer to infidel thinking.when a man wants a woman without islamic values that means he is rebelling against Allah.poor souls.


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benmuthlaq
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Posted on Tue, Oct 24, 2006 00:04

assalamulaykum to all muslimeen ummah... it is always perfect to obey the allah swt commands and the hadith of Prophet Moh saw. coz its allah swt promise to reward to all those who obey and follow what is stated in qur-an in mention in hadith. as a man and as a true muhmineen like ourselves we like and prepare those who wear hijab 100%.. be proud of allah command in the hereafter allah will give you a great award. salam..


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nayyar_rahman
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Posted on Mon, Oct 23, 2006 14:54

Hijab sould be left on the consent of our sister and my opinion is that any god fearing sister would love to have a hijab!!!!


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fatima22
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Posted on Sat, Oct 21, 2006 02:38

Jazakum Allahu Khairun bother AbouMohamed... I sincerely appreciate your tremendous effort of inputing the valuable details. Only Allah is capable of rewarding you for such kind gesture maasalama fatima


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