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Saddest day of my life Posted on Mon, Apr 17, 2006 23:22
Yesterday was a day that i would never want to remember. I was officially divorced by my husband without his willingness. You see he would never want to release me at first place or never at all as he loves me so much but at the same time having a relationship with someone whom he has a view to marry. I love my ex-husband as much but i've no choice to file a divorce as he couldn't afford financially or the ability to re-marry. The only way is either i have to go or the other party has to go. And it seemed he was adamant to keep her in his life as well as me. So i've to make the dicision. I've been tolerating his infidelity for almost 9 mths. I've asked him what had i done wrong or had i not been doing gd as a wife. And his answered was NO. I've done a gd job that was what he said. It was just so happened he met someone and eventually fell in love. Even though i'm a strong believer and a practised muslimah but i couldn't bring myself to share my husband with someone else. I think i would suffer more if i were to stay on with him coz i know i'm still not up to that higher level yet to accept or feel at ease when my husband re-marry again. Sooner or later the feeling of jealosy/betrayed/rivalry/incomplacent/lack of attention and time will slowly surfaced. And being my ex-husband i knew he was not capable in being equal and just. Therefore to avoid myself of creating more sins later on and to have it eventually affect my islamic duties/obligations, i backed off from this marriage and let him pursue his interest with her. I've sincerely forgave both him and her on all the hardships,pains and sufferings that they have caused me. I wish them happiness and may ALLAH show them the right path. This is the most i can do as a good wife.