i was at the point where you are one upon a time. i was literally at home all the time not doing anything...just brain dead, i felt that there has to be more to life than this. so i started to study law. it was hard in the beginnig because my husband is backwards..n ..iilterate.
but when you have a drive then nothing can stop you.
i dont know about you sister but all i can say is that if you dont have any commitments then you really dont have anything to worry about. if i could i wouldve invited you over to my place and i wouldve taken you around the uk..but unfortuntely im not in that postion..other wise it would be no problem.
i would suggest that if you have decided to go alone then be extremley careful one of the best way to do this is to apply for work in the country of your destination..that would be more secure for you. other ways is to travel with groups you can have this information at the travel centre or on line of these companies....oh yes make sure that you have enough money to travel as well as come back. go to one or two places at a time. you dont want to lose everything at home.
as for the question about children turning away from their deen..this only happens when parents refuse to see where their children are coming from.
it is extremly hard to get them back on to the right track n the only way i know is to lecture parents in the community and lecture kids at school as well as the mosque..and to give out leaflets to people with information..there could be other ways but im just being realistic..no body wants somebody in their face to tell the the smae thing as their parents did. there has to be a great deal of understanding in human nature before embarking on this kind of thing.
thats a sad story Pagaly... but there are so many of those... were the children just go out doing their own thing..away from the deen.
i know a similar story .. family do not hear the child, and although child was decent all this while, child rebels and sadly transgresses the deen too, in defiance.
how do we stop that sister Pagaly. hwo do we intercept that journey fro hte child - being an outsider watching in. because going to hte parents will not work... how do we draw them back into the beauty of the deen?
any suggestions anybody?
i'm well alhamdulillah sister. just at a crossraod now.
its two successive weeks now that i lost a day - thursday came to soon for me.. still thought it was wednesday.
yes i realise it is a sign of Qiyamah. but the problem is that my life is only work and home. It feels incomplete, but i dont have the time for more. how do we take control of our lives again.... and not be lose it to time.
...i'm thinking i need to do soemthing more fulfilling with my life, and not spend it in the office. For now my thoughts are at workign fewer hours, or changing jobs to soemthign that actually benefits a broader community than just the bottomline of companies.
after reading Ali's story thought i might as well re write part 1
ther was a girl called samina, she had two sisters un fortunatley they all were primiscious..over a period of time her parents got the eldest siter married in swat and left her there..she was treated really bad by het inlaws and her husband..she literally begged her parents to bring her back but they didnt.
then the same thing happened to the 2nd sister. when it was samina's turn she asked her parents thant she did not want to get married form anyone from back home but in this country, her parents refused.
samina moved out went off on a holiday n gave her parents another chance..still they did not listen to her so she then moved out.
she wore westen clothes..micro minis..was obviously primiscious..before her parents didnt know...but now everyone does.
this part was re written and goes with PART2 below.
i personelly feel that parents should never treat their children with favouritism.
samina has a younger brother..he was so sweet his sister always doted over him...but now hes lost that sparkle..
slm sister 1jewel...i think part 1 got lost in the mail...lol:)...dont ask me where it went coz i know i had posted it..lol..anyway how are you...long time since you were on this site...hope everything is ok...what are you doing these days?
i still think that her parenyts should've listend to her, they now goes around with their head lowered, but samina walks around with her head up high.
i knew after woulds that all three sister were promiscious, but still at the same time i think that tis would've only came across because the parents didnt give them the attention that they should've.
one should respect ones childs point of view and that child should be able to tell their parents what they feel is right or wrong and why, i can say one thing coz i have my kids telling me thier minds all the time, at times it can be hard to digest but i would prefer to know thier minds then know what they have done aftr wards.
I have lived on my own for 5 yrs, away from my family. I have experienced the difficulties that come with it - being single, being female, being muslim, living in an non-Islamic state where there are fitnahs coming at you from all sides. there were even other muslim families around, but because i was single, i suppose they though i would steal their husbands, so they never befriended me.
Shelbel, f_madani - Pagaly is right - it is very useful adn helpful speakign about your probs - cos to ur surprise someone may actually understand, or help you to c things from a different perspective or offer good, sincere advice.
i'm not a gold member yet - not sure if i will sign up... but pls do feel free to contact me and talk about it.
salaam sister shebell..well y dont u try telling wot the issue was for u moving out?...belive it or not there would be thousands in ur position.
theres a saying that when u talk to someone about ur probs then consider it halfved
so sorry to hear how u feel..wish i was there to give u a big hug..yes i do understand how u feel honestly here where i live we have so many ppl who have come from abroad..yet because theres a close nit Asian community everyone gets on with each other..sometimes ppl from larger cities react differently n some from smaller cities..as long as u dont let Ur guard down sis u have no problem..do u live in an Asian area..have u come across Muslims??..wot do they say to u?..hope u dont mind replying
Tc or urself n try to be happy..if u want i will reply to u as many times as u like..hope u dont mind about this
i am arab.. and i am living in London now for some postgraduate courses..
i live alone now and i do feel lonely..
plus not so many people would udnerstand what i feel and what kind of needs i have.. they judge and talk bad to me..